I have never exactly needed an excuse to lead a contentedly sedentary life. In elementary school, when other children would frolic on the playground and swing across the monkey bars, I would sit on the ledge and examine acorns and woodchips for their resemblance to people's faces. Later on, when we would run laps in PE, I would run fewer laps than needed to comprise the required mile, and still end up finishing much later than most of my classmates. When we would play team sports, I sucked so badly that my team members would soon end up disregarding my presence on the team, and I would sit on the bench behind them and crack my knuckles. And when it came to the social dance unit, I tried to ask my mom to write a note explaining that such an activity ran contrary to my culture -- but she wouldn't do it, so I suffered through it, embarrassed by my sweaty adolescent palms.
Until college, at least I had to go through a few motions in PE. During college and law school, at least I had to walk around on campus once in a while, to take exams and such. When I worked for someone else, at least I had to walk out of the office "to the bathroom" 25 times a day to maintain my sanity. But now that I can work from home, and I can instantly stream from a slew of movies and assorted programming to my TV, and I have a smartphone that allows me to do practically anything with a freakin' thumb, what hope is there for me to contain my corpulence?
Hark! I went for a little stroll to run some errands a couple of months ago, and, not wanting to interrupt Katy Perry Radio on Pandora, I put my earphones in so I could continue listening while walking. It was so invigorating to anticipate the next mystery tune and then match my pace to it that I continued on toward the Lake Merritt and walked the entire 3.5-mile perimeter. Each song uniquely enhanced whatever I was viewing: ducks swimming in unison to Usher's "OMG," a couple making out on a grassy hill to Ne-Yo's "Beautiful Monster," a happy dude pushing an ice cream truck to Tinchy Stryder's "Number 1." OK, it was sometimes a stretch to make the soundtrack relevant to the view, but it was an enjoyable exercise nonetheless. Of course, there were a couple of downsides to drowning out the natural sounds of my surroundings. Rarely is a dull conversation heard around the lake, so I missed out on eavesdropping; also, I almost got run over by a couple of bicyclists, since their frantic "Left! Left!" was left inaudible to me. Still, the activity was engaging enough to endure all the way to this day!
In the last two weeks, I have been trying to make more productive use of Netflix streaming. Rather than continue to park myself in front of the TV and watch reruns of The Office while simultaneously playing Angry Birds and snacking on a platter of pizza rolls and cookies, I now sometimes switch up the aforementioned routine with one of the many yoga and Pilates routines that grace the collection. It is a perfect way to pass the time while I'm waiting for the next round of pizza rolls to finish baking!
Technology has the power to turn us into indolent fucks who communicate and control everything with our thumbs. But we also have the power to move with technology!
Until college, at least I had to go through a few motions in PE. During college and law school, at least I had to walk around on campus once in a while, to take exams and such. When I worked for someone else, at least I had to walk out of the office "to the bathroom" 25 times a day to maintain my sanity. But now that I can work from home, and I can instantly stream from a slew of movies and assorted programming to my TV, and I have a smartphone that allows me to do practically anything with a freakin' thumb, what hope is there for me to contain my corpulence?
Hark! I went for a little stroll to run some errands a couple of months ago, and, not wanting to interrupt Katy Perry Radio on Pandora, I put my earphones in so I could continue listening while walking. It was so invigorating to anticipate the next mystery tune and then match my pace to it that I continued on toward the Lake Merritt and walked the entire 3.5-mile perimeter. Each song uniquely enhanced whatever I was viewing: ducks swimming in unison to Usher's "OMG," a couple making out on a grassy hill to Ne-Yo's "Beautiful Monster," a happy dude pushing an ice cream truck to Tinchy Stryder's "Number 1." OK, it was sometimes a stretch to make the soundtrack relevant to the view, but it was an enjoyable exercise nonetheless. Of course, there were a couple of downsides to drowning out the natural sounds of my surroundings. Rarely is a dull conversation heard around the lake, so I missed out on eavesdropping; also, I almost got run over by a couple of bicyclists, since their frantic "Left! Left!" was left inaudible to me. Still, the activity was engaging enough to endure all the way to this day!
In the last two weeks, I have been trying to make more productive use of Netflix streaming. Rather than continue to park myself in front of the TV and watch reruns of The Office while simultaneously playing Angry Birds and snacking on a platter of pizza rolls and cookies, I now sometimes switch up the aforementioned routine with one of the many yoga and Pilates routines that grace the collection. It is a perfect way to pass the time while I'm waiting for the next round of pizza rolls to finish baking!
Technology has the power to turn us into indolent fucks who communicate and control everything with our thumbs. But we also have the power to move with technology!
You will be pleased to know that I was eating a tub of Ben & Jerry's while reading this.
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